You cannot lie when writing poetry. Poetry is raw emotion and feeling. Your soul is pouring out of you. I hid my poems for more than 17 years, not even the closest people to me knew that I was writing. I was afraid if anyone read my poetry it would be like them seeing me naked, seeing my bare soul. I am at my most truthful in my poetry because when 1 am writing there is nowhere to hide from myself I am confessing to the white piece of paper like it is a priest. Always have done! Writing was my space, my little world where I didn't let anyone in, my secret Johari Window. This was my way of dealing with the core of human existence; love, suffering, pain, grief, renewal, change. In an unpredictable and unstable life, my writing was my only constant and my anchor. The white piece of paper was my friend, sometimes my only friend. This book is written in the 2020 pandemic, in isolation, in lockdown, but depite this I follow the calling of my soul and fulfill my childhood forgotten dream.